It’s Not Always About You
Last week I had an interesting conversation, with a lady that I had not visited in nearly three years. We met through our businesses, and she would frequently call me for advice or coaching from time to time, regarding her business. We had a great conversation just catching up with each other’s lives. She told me that she had wondered how I was doing from time to time and that she was so glad to hear from me.
When we got ready to end our conversation, she said. “There is something that I think that you should know, I sent you a text about an event and you never responded”. She proceeded to tell me that she thought that I along with others was trying to block her from attending a special training event. Go figure!
I was absolutely stunned! I honestly did not remember the text at all. I apologized to her because it was very obvious that she was still hurt over this and still held resentment about it. I was absolutely clueless!
My next thought was why would she think that I would not want her to get the special training? After that I thought, why would she hold something like this in her heart for three years, giving it an opportunity to fester unforgiveness and bitterness, when she could just pick up the phone and ask me about it, instead of assuming? Finally, it dawned on me that the enemy was at work here.
When I got off the phone, out of curiosity, I decided to scroll back through the text messages that I had received from her, and there it was. Next, I looked at the date that the text came through, and it was August 19th of 2020. My husband had open heart surgery during that time and a week before his surgery I was released from the hospital and rehab after being away from home for twenty-one days. No wonder I didn’t see her text!
You may be asking why I am sharing all of this drama. There are several reasons. Here are some lessons that I learned from this encounter.
1. Unresolved issues are at the root of unforgiveness and bitterness. Satan loves it when we are full of unforgiveness, bitterness, and even hatred toward our brothers and sisters.
2. Ask don’t assume. Many times things are nothing like we assume them to be.
3. Don’t take things personally. It’s not always about you.
4. Look for the good in people not the bad.
5. Even when you are not the one wrong, be respectful of the other person’s feelings. It may not make sense to you, but it’s real to them.
6. Pray for those who thrive on drama and love them from a distance.
7. People will disappoint you, but God never will.
Ephesians 4:2
2 Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.
Proverbs 17:9
9 Love prospers when a fault is forgiven, but dwelling on it separates close friends.
Ephesians 4:32
32 Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.
Colossians 3:13
13 Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.
Hebrews 12:15
15 Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.